All or Nothing.

February 5, 2012

I started my own coaching company in 2008 and have always had a dream to have an amazing website built for it. Right at the outset I got quotes in for the design from a designer that I really admired. The design alone was R20, 000 and that was far more than I earned in the first three months of being in business! As a result, my dream was placed high up on an unreachable shelf and catalogued with all the other “never to be accomplished dreams”. Do you have a section in your life library with that heading? The main characteristic of this particular section is “if you can’t have it all perfect at the outset, then you would rather have nothing at all”.
I’m embarrassed to admit that for nearly three years I have been running my business without a website. The “all or nothing” trap had me so paralyzed that I ended up creating the exact opposite of what I wanted. I wanted a website to increase my visibility, make my business findable, connect with like minded people and give credibility to my business. After all, every self respecting business has an on line presence right????? ( I know, that might be a limiting belief I need to take to inquiry.)
Yet by doing nothing at all, I was in danger of never doing anything ever. I found myself becoming more and more terrified of starting. As social media became more mainstream, with new functionalities being added each week, the size of my “all” grew more amorphous and unwieldy. The website beast was taking on ghastly proportions. Whereas in the beginning I might have gotten by with a website with simple easy functionality, now I would have to be a google+, facebook, twitter, and blogging expert. I’d have to learn how to create circles, linkin, tweet, blog and be on social media 24 hours a day just trying to catch up with the rest of the world! Overwhelm.
The beast was growing whilst I had chosen not to look at it and I was just getting further and further away from ever starting. By wanting to have it all, I was staying stuck with having nothing.
Well last night at about 8 pm, I took the deep plunge into the deep sea of DIY website building and I am happy to report that just before midnight, I went LIVE. From three years of nothing to being able to be found by millions in three hours. Mind blowing and painless I might add. It may not be all, but it’s not nothing either. Have a look at (Don’t you just love how it rhymes?)
This has been such an empowering experience for me and what I found is that:
• Sometimes fear masks the very quality that we need to embody to face our beast. For me that quality was courage. By walking up to your beast you might just become the person you need to be to face it.
• Starting somewhere is better than never starting at all. Whilst you may not have everything in the beginning, you will have something to push off against. It is very hard to build on no foundation, so start somewhere and keep moving forward, little by little. One day you will wake up and find that you are exactly where you want to be. Do what you can from where you are now and commit to improving from there in bite size manageable chunks. The old adage of eating an elephant one bite at a time really does make sense.
• The more you do, the more you can and want to do. I am no longer feeling the social media overwhelm. I might even get into blogging more – I am not saying every week but definitely more than never.
• Nothing is ever as bad as it seems. I spent three years frightening and berating myself about how difficult and complicated building a website is. The reality bore no resemblance to all the things I had imagined. For one, I never imagined that it would be fun. That was a real surprise. I recommend, instead of slaying your dragon or fighting with your beast, get friendly with it. Get to know it a little better and see how you can use it to actually alleviate some of your burdens.
My website dragon is now my friend, I dare say we may even become buddies! Don’t let your fear of not having it “all” stop you from having something that you really want. Start where you are and keep moving forward.


One Response to “All or Nothing.”

  1. JK said

    Excellent post. I enjoy your writing.
    As we say in the South:
    Start where you are
    Use what you got
    Do what you can

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